My Beer Money: The Things I Do

Do the Stuff I Used to Buy My Beer is a song set to the tune of Do-Re-Mi from The Sound of Music. The song is often attributed to Homer Simpson from the show The Simpsons, although it has never been sung on the show. The song is about a man who likes to drink beer and his journey to get it. The song has different variations, but the first line is always Dough, the stuff that buys me beer.

Buying beer at a grocery store

Know what day it is

Crappy beer is a silent killer. It ruins your post-gym, it's-been-a-long-day refreshment. But you can arm yourself. You can stay safe.

Know what beer you're buying

Buying good beer is tough, mostly because of what happens after the beer leaves the brewery. Not every store knows what they're doing with their haul, so it's on you to make sure you're getting a proper six-pack.

Freshness is key

With the exception of high alcohol stouts and Belgian beers (which mellow with age), you want fresh beer. Most beer bottles or cans will tell you how fresh the beer is. Look for the “bottled on” or “best by” date on the bottom or side of the can or bottle. Don’t buy IPAs or pale ales bottled over a month ago, and avoid beer within two months of its “best by” date.

When in doubt, head to the fridge

As a general rule, never buy an IPA that has been stored at room temperature. If you do, you’re disrespecting the IPA’s flavor at the highest level. Hop oils (which give beers fruity, piney flavor) lose their potency in a warm climate, leaving you with a beer that’s all bitterness and no flavor. If you’re buying an IPA, pale ale, dry-hopped saison, or anything hoppy, head to the refrigerated beer section.

Support big business

When you’re in a supermarket, you’re going to see a lot of national brands and large craft breweries. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s almost a guarantee that the beer you buy will be fresh, because so many people are buying it. That means the store has to restock more frequently, which means newer beer.

Talk to the beer person

Someone is in charge of the beer at your grocery store. Ask them when shipments came in, what beers they’re excited about, what’s coming in soon, and if there’s anything to avoid. This is another way to verify that freshness. Plus, sometimes beer workers keep a stash of the good stuff in the back, for customers who show an interest.

Buying fresh beer

Beer is perishable, and while it won't spoil in the same way milk does, it is best consumed fresh. Only a small number of beers taste better with age, and even then, it is not worth waiting. Beer has four main enemies: light, heat, oxygen, and time. These factors cause the flavours of beer to dull and disappear, and eventually, the beer will take on a skunky aroma or a cardboard and cooking-sherry flavour.

When buying beer, it is important to consider the time factor first. Nine out of ten beers get worse the longer they stay in the bottle, with hoppy beers losing a significant amount of aroma. Oxygen also starts to ravage the beer, making it taste like cardboard or cooking sherry. Therefore, it is always advisable to look for "bottled-on" dates printed on the label or bottle. As a general rule of thumb, beer will taste best within the first 30 days of being bottled, so it is best to avoid bottles that have been packaged for more than 90 days.

Some bottles will have "Enjoy by" dates instead of bottling dates, but these can be deceptive as they do not indicate how long the beer has been in the bottle. If no "bottled-on" date is available, consider other factors such as the popularity of the beer at the shop, how close the brewery is, and whether a salesperson can estimate when the beer was received.

Temperature is another crucial factor when buying fresh beer. Hoppy beers, in particular, are very fragile, so they should be avoided if they have been stored on a warm shelf. Higher alcohol, less hoppy beers can withstand room temperature better, but cold storage is always preferable for maintaining freshness. Additionally, beer should not be stored in direct sunlight, as this will affect its taste.

When buying beer on tap at a bar, it can be tricky to determine its freshness since most servers and bartenders cannot provide the date the keg was filled. In this case, opting for local breweries is a good idea, as they can deliver fresh beer more quickly. It is also a good practice to ask for a taste of the beer before committing to a full pour to ensure it is not stale.

Beer from large craft breweries

The term "craft beer" is arbitrary, but the Brewers Association defines a craft brewery as small (producing 6 million barrels of beer per year or less); independent (less than 25% owned by a larger alcohol company that isn't a craft brewery); and traditional (using traditional or innovative brewing ingredients and their fermentation processes).

Despite the independence being a key signifier of craft breweries, many are being acquired by larger companies. In 2017, more than a dozen of America's most popular craft breweries were bought by global beverage companies. This number has only increased in recent years, with AB InBev alone owning 10 craft brands as of 2017.

This has led to concerns that small craft brands are being squeezed out of warehouses, delivery vans, and supermarkets as larger companies pressure distributors and retailers to favour their brands.

• D. G. Yuengling and Son Inc (Pottsville, PA)
• Boston Beer Co (Boston, MA and Milton, DE)
• Sierra Nevada Brewing Co (Chico, CA)
• Duvel Moortgat USA (Paso Robles, CA; Kansas City, MO; and Cooperstown, NY)
• Gambrinus (Shiner, TX and Berkeley, CA)
• Tilray Beer Brands (Atlanta, GA; Montauk, NY; San Diego, CA; Bend, OR; Seattle, WA; Portland, OR; Breckenridge, CO; and Patchogue, NY)
• Artisanal Brewing Ventures (Downingtown, PA; Lakewood, NY; and Brooklyn, NY)
• Brooklyn Brewery (Brooklyn, NY)
• Monster Brewing (Longmont, CO; Tampa, FL; Salt Lake City, UT; Comstock, MI; and Dallas, TX)
• Athletic Brewing Company (Milford, CT)
• New Glarus Brewing Co (New Glarus, WI)
• Deschutes Brewery (Bend, OR)
• Matt Brewing Co (Utica, NY)
• Gordon Biersch Brewing Co (San Jose, CA)
• Allagash Brewing Company (Portland, ME)
• Georgetown Brewing Co (Seattle, WA)
• Great Lakes Brewing Company (Cleveland, OH)
• Harpoon Brewery (Boston, MA)
• Stevens Point Brewery (Stevens Point, WI)
• Three Floyds Brewing (Munster, IN)
• Pittsburgh Brewing Co (Pittsburgh, PA)
• Rhinegeist Brewery (Cincinnati, OH)
• Narragansett Brewing Co (Pawtucket, RI)
• August Schell Brewing Company (New Ulm, MN)
• Odell Brewing Co (Fort Collins, CO)
• Craft ‘Ohana (Maui/Modern Times) (Kihei, HI and San Diego, CA)
• Troegs Brewing Co (Hershey, PA)
• Fiddlehead Brewing (Shelburne, VT)
• Minhas Craft Brewery (Monroe, WI)
• Kings & Convicts Brewing (San Diego, CA)
• Alaskan Brewing Co. (Juneau, AK)
• Kona Brewing Hawaii (Kailua-Kona, HI)
• Abita Brewing Co (Covington, LA)
• Creature Comforts Brewing Co. (Athens, GA)
• Great Frontier Holdings (Eugene, OR and Portland, OR)
• BrewDog Brewing Co (Canal Winchester, OH)
• Summit Brewing Co (St. Paul, MN)
• Jack's Abby Brewing, LLC (Framingham, MA)
• Revolution Brewing (Chicago, IL)
• Montucky Cold Snacks (Bozeman, MT)
• Saint Arnold Brewing Co (Houston, TX)
• Lost Coast Brewery (Eureka, CA)
• Surly Brewing Company (Minneapolis, MN)
• Rogue Ales Brewery (Newport, OR)
• United States Beverage LLC (Salt Lake City, UT and Elmsford, NY)
• Shipyard Brewing Co (Portland, ME)
• Pizza Port (Carlsbad, CA)
• Coronado Brewing Co (Coronado, CA)
• Drake's Brewing Co (San Leandro, CA)
• IndieBrew (Atlanta, GA and Nashville, TN)

Talking to the beer person

The beer person may also be able to recommend beers that are about to come into stock, so you can get your hands on something new and exciting. It's also worth asking if they have any special beers stashed away at the back for interested customers. You might be able to access a beer that isn't available to other shoppers.

Don't be afraid to ask questions. The beer person is a valuable resource and can offer insights that will enhance your beer-buying experience. They may be able to point you towards a great beer that you might otherwise have overlooked, or even help you discover a new favourite.

It's worth noting that the level of knowledge of the beer person may vary. You might encounter a knowledgeable beer enthusiast or someone who is less familiar with the product. Either way, they will likely have insights into the store's operations and can help you make an informed purchase.

So, don't hesitate to strike up a conversation with the beer person. Their expertise can help you navigate the wide range of options and make the best choice for your taste preferences.

Weird new brews

BrewDog The End of History

This beer by Scottish brewer BrewDog has a whopping 55% alcohol content. But what's even more surprising is its outer packaging: taxidermized squirrels acting as a very extreme beer koozie.

Rocky Mountain Oysters Stout

Denver's Wynkoop Brewing created this stout with a local delicacy: bison testicles, also known as Rocky Mountain Oysters in the Mountain West. This beer was originally an April Fools prank but ended up becoming a hit with beer enthusiasts.

Fungus Shui

Meadow Lark Brewing's Fungus Shui is a golden ale with a twist—it's brewed with Candy Cap mushrooms. These mushrooms have a unique flavour profile, tasting like high-end maple syrup rather than mushrooms. The result is a strangely tasty brew with a lovely golden colour.

Sea King: Sunken Ship Beer

Saint James Brewery in New York state crafted this unique beer using yeast found in bottles salvaged from the wreck of the SS Oregon, a ship that sank in 1886! Talk about ancient yeast!

Space Barley

Japanese brewer Sapporo took beer to new heights—literally—with their Space Barley brew. They used barley that spent five months on the International Space Station as part of a test to help humans live on other planets. This out-of-this-world beer came with a hefty price tag of $110.

Black Truffle Pilsner

Chicago's Moody Tongue brewery knows how to indulge with their Black Truffle Pilsner. Packed with summer truffles from France, this beer will cost you $120. But for truffle lovers, it might just be worth the splurge.

Frequently asked questions