Hoof Hearted Beer: A Cautionary Tale For The Unwary

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Hoof Hearted Brewing has been in the beer business since 1996, crafting beers with all the subtlety of David Lee Roth in bunless chaps. The brewery is based in Marengo, Ohio, and is known for its creative and playful beer names and flavours. From Don't Microwave It, Don't Boil It to Did We Just Become Best Fwendz?, Hoof Hearted Brewing offers a range of unique beers that are sure to surprise and delight craft beer enthusiasts. With a focus on hop-wrangling and nude air guitar prowess, they aim to provide fresh, high-quality, and fun beers to elevate any party.

Characteristics Values
Brewery Hoof Hearted Brewing
Location Marengo, OH, United States
Beer Styles Imperial/Double IPA, Imperial/Double Milkshake IPA, Triple IPA, New England/Hazy IPA, Sour IPA, Imperial Stout, American Pale Ale, Sour Ale, Imperial/Double Black IPA, Imperial/Double Coffee Stout, Imperial/Double Milk Stout, Russian Imperial Stout, and more
ABV Range 4.5% to 15%
IBUs Not specified, but described as "bittersweet" and "bitter"
Flavors Tropical fruit, citrus, stone fruit, floral, pine resin, cereal, honey, cake dough, grapefruit, tangerine, lemon, apricot, passionfruit, pawpaw, papaya, kiwi, cedar, spruce tip, hemp, spicy vodka, peach, mango, marshmallow, strawberry, cheescake, orange, guava, pineapple, coconut, banana, chocolate, coconut, hazelnut, vanilla, maple syrup, cinnamon, rainbow mochi, and more
Hops Citra, Motueka, Simcoe, Dr. Rudi, Galaxy, El Dorado, Amarillo, Belma, Mosaic, Bru-1, Topaz, Centennial, NZ Waimea, NZ Motueka, Nelson Sauvin, Australian Ella, Azacca, Vic Secret, Strata, Sabro, Nectaron, Riwaka, and more
Other Ingredients Fruit purée, milk sugar, lactose, French fries, cacao nibs, maple syrup, coffee, vanilla, coconut, wildflower honey, orange blossom honey, oat, Belgian farmhouse ale yeast, cinnamon, vanilla, maple syrup, pumpkin, squash, and more
Beer Names If You Can't Be Good, Be Bald, All My Friends Are Dead, Don't Microwave It Don't Boil It, Don’t Worry, My Mom Said It’s Cool, Everybody Wants Some!!, Momma Needs Her Fruit Punch, Don't Drink Beer Hoof Hearted, and more

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'Don't Microwave It, Don't Boil It' – a sour IPA with boysenberry, lemon zest, Tahitian vanilla and milk sugar

Don't Microwave It, Don't Boil It is a beer crafted by Hoof Hearted Brewing. It is a sour IPA with boysenberry, lemon zest, Tahitian vanilla, and milk sugar. The beer is a collaboration with DSSØLVR in Ashville, NC.

Hoof Hearted Brewing has been in the industry since late 2011 and is known for its "deft hop-wrangling and nude air guitar prowess." They offer a range of unique and creative beers, including sours, IPAs, stouts, and more.

Don't Microwave It, Don't Boil It is a play on the phrase "don't cry over spilled milk," suggesting that this beer is so good, you shouldn't waste a single drop. The addition of boysenberry and lemon zest gives it a fruity and tangy flavor, while Tahitian vanilla and milk sugar add a creamy, sweet balance.

This particular brew has an alcohol by volume (ABV) of 6%, which is on the higher end for IPAs. It is available for purchase online and in select stores, typically in 4-packs of 16oz cans. However, it may be sold out or have limited availability, so those interested in trying it may need to act fast.

Hoof Hearted Brewing's Don't Microwave It, Don't Boil It is a unique and playful take on the traditional IPA, combining unexpected ingredients to create a complex and intriguing craft beer. With its high ABV and sour flavor profile, it offers a bold and memorable drinking experience.

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'Did We Just Become Best Fwendz' – a rotating double IPA featuring Citra and Motueka

'Did We Just Become Best Fwendz' is a rotating double IPA featuring Citra and Motueka hops. It is brewed by Hoof Hearted Brewing in Marengo, Ohio, and has an ABV of 8.0%. Although the beer is no longer in production, it was previously available at various locations, including BeerStyles Taproom & Gastropub, Barley & Bine Beer Cafe, and Studio 35 Cinema & Drafthouse.

The beer received positive reviews from users, with an average rating of 4.42/5 on BeerAdvocate. Reviewers described it as having a "beautiful medium to full and smooth mouth feel", with a "gorgeous light golden haze" and a "nice citrus dank fruits" nose. The taste was characterised by tropical fruits and juicy citrus, with a smooth, hoppy profile.

Hoof Hearted Brewing is known for its "deft hop-wrangling" and has been in operation since late 2011. They have a range of creative and playful beer names, such as 'Don't Microwave It Don't Boil It', 'Are We Having Fun Yet?', and 'I Must Look Like A Dork'.

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'Everybody Wants Some' – a rotating single hop DIPA series

Everybody Wants Some!! is a rotating single hop DIPA series by Hoof Hearted Brewing. The company has been in the industry since late 2011 and is known for its "deft hop-wrangling and nude air guitar prowess".

The Everybody Wants Some!! series is a fantastical journey, or quest, to put a singular focus on all their favourite hop varieties, one at a time. With a simple malt base of Pilsner Malt and Oats, the single hop varieties are allowed to shine without stepping on each other's toes.

The series includes:

  • Everybody Wants Some Amarillo
  • Everybody Wants Some Australian Ella
  • Everybody Wants Some Azacca
  • Everybody Wants Some Citra
  • Everybody Wants Some El Dorado
  • Everybody Wants Some Galaxy
  • Everybody Wants Some Mosaic
  • Everybody Wants Some Motueka
  • Everybody Wants Some Nelson Sauvin
  • Everybody Wants Some Simcoe
  • Everybody Wants Some Strata
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry Hopped Citra
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry Hopped Nelson Sauvin
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry Hopped Sabro
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry Hopped Strata
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry-Hopped Enigma
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry-Hopped Nectaron
  • Everybody Wants Some Vic Secret
  • Everybody Wants Some 3X
  • Everybody wants some TDH Vic secret
  • Everybody Wants Some Triple Dry Hopped El Dorado

Hoof Hearted Brewing is based in Marengo, Ohio, and has a range of other beers, including a New England IPA, a Russian Imperial Stout, and a Sour Triple IPA.

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'Don't Worry, My Mom Said It's Cool' – a double IPA with French fries, cacao nibs, vanilla and milk sugar

Don't Worry, My Mom Said It's Cool: A Beer for the Adventurous

Hoof Hearted Brewing has been in the business of crafting unique and adventurous beers since 2011. Their latest creation, "Don't Worry, My Mom Said It's Cool", is a double IPA that pushes the boundaries of traditional brewing. This beer is an unexpected combination of French fries, cacao nibs, vanilla, and milk sugar, promising an explosion of flavors.

The idea behind this beer is to bring together contrasting elements, creating a complex and intriguing taste profile. French fries, though not a typical beer ingredient, contribute a savory, crispy texture to the brew. Cacao nibs, on the other hand, provide a rich, chocolatey flavor that balances the salty notes. Vanilla adds a subtle sweetness and rounds off the sharp edges, while milk sugar enhances the creaminess and body of the beer.

The result is a double IPA that challenges conventions and delights the senses. "Don't Worry, My Mom Said It's Cool" is an innovative brew that showcases the brewer's creativity and willingness to experiment. It's a beer that encourages drinkers to embrace their adventurous side and explore new flavor territories.

This unique beer is an invitation to let go of inhibitions and embrace the unexpected. It's a reminder that sometimes, the best experiences come from stepping out of our comfort zones and saying, "Don't worry, my mom said it's cool"! So, if you're feeling daring, grab a pint of this intriguing brew and prepare for a flavor journey like no other.

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'Even More Tennis Elbow' – a double mash Imperial Stout with hazelnut, coconut and vanilla

Even More Tennis Elbow is a double mash Imperial Stout with hazelnut, coconut and vanilla. It is a collaboration between Hoof Hearted Brewing and Evil Twin.

Hoof Hearted Brewing has been in the industry since late 2011 and is known for its "deft hop-wrangling and nude air guitar prowess". They produce a variety of beers, including IPAs, stouts, ales, and lagers, with creative and playful names.

Even More Tennis Elbow is a strong, dark beer with a high alcohol content of 13.0% ABV. The addition of hazelnut, coconut, and vanilla gives it a unique flavour profile that likely complements the roasted, chocolate, and coffee notes typical of Imperial Stouts.

The name "Even More Tennis Elbow" is a playful take on the idea of a strong, heavy beer being hard-hitting, perhaps like a tennis ball hitting your elbow. The name also adds a light-hearted and humorous touch to the drinking experience, which is in line with Hoof Hearted Brewing's fun and quirky branding.

This beer is perfect for those who enjoy strong, flavourful beers with unique and creative ingredients. It offers a complex tasting experience that combines the richness of an Imperial Stout with the sweetness and nuttiness of the added ingredients. Even More Tennis Elbow is an excellent choice for those looking to explore new flavours in their beer palate.

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Frequently asked questions

The ABV of Mom Jeans is 8%.

Some of the flavours in If You Can't Be Good, Be Bald are honey, poundcake, cake dough, white grapefruit, tangerine, lemon, passionfruit, pawpaw, papaya, and kiwi.

Some of the beers brewed by Hoof Hearted Brewing are Musk of the Minotaur, Mom Jeans, If You Can't Be Good, Be Bald, and Don't Microwave It, Don't Boil It.

Hoof Hearted Brewing is located in Marengo, Ohio, United States.

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